A True City Girl Tells A Story

So last night I went out with a new friend Annette. She was talking to me via email the other day and the emails kind of went like this

Annette - is your hubby home yet?
Me- no and looks like he will be gone for even longer
Annette - I think your bored and lonely "we need a girls night out"
Annette - "OK I ADMIT IT, I'M WEAK AND I NEED A NIGHT OUT!! DRAG IT OUT OF ME ALREADY!!"
Me - notice I didn't even have time to say GREAT IDEA... LOL but I finally got to say Great Idea
I was just laughing to myself thinking wow she needs a stress free life like me! Great a new friend would be nice, so we made plans to go out on Friday Night.

we met for dinner and had our kids and sent them packing, I mean if you plan on going to bars up and down main street you might as well walk right! That way we aren't drinking and driving so we were smart that way. We dropped into this little hole in the wall, I had corona she had tequila. We had a couple of drinks and talked and got to know each other. Come to find out we have a lot in common. It was a good evening, so we decided to go to the next bar. I had Corona she had more tequila! Remember that's her drink of choice and she's the one who told me your clothes fall off. I was asking her about that because I was worried maybe I should watch her so they didn't just fall off - LOL - she claims it is a song (sure it is!!! LOL). I had beer only because I am still fighting this stupid cold. So her hubby is coming to pick us up which is perfect beacuse we had been drinking, anyway I start to tell them about a story that happened to us when we first moved up here. So I thought I would share it with you.

I have always been a valley girl, born and raised is Southern California. Had my children in Southern California and my hubby is from Southern California. So we moved up to Northern California on 10 acres. Now we are city folks, rush rush rush. Need everything now. So took a little time to get adjusted for sure. Anyway one weekend our very good friend Rob comes up to visit. By Visit I mean he comes up to party and work his ass off helping us get the property in order. You know there is a lot of shit to do when you have 10 acres to care for. We had to remove about 40 trees to put our house in so we had a massive pile of trees that needed to be cut up and made into firewood. Now let me set the stage for you shall I. Raining out side so everything is muddy and slippery and just plain crappy outside. Kenny (my hubby) and Rob have a few beers - and when I say a few I mean A TON! I must have had a couple (maybe 1 or 5). They are out side in this horrible gloomy weather with chain saws - that sounds scary, a tractor, and of course their beer. So they are moving this stump down the hill, pulling it with the tractor to this spot we call the stump grave yard. I mean what are you going to do with 40 stumps. We have a lot of deer up here and they run around all day and night. So the deer are coming by and see Kenny and Rob and the tractor. One gets a little close and gets spooked, a little guy, Well the poor little deer jumps and by a freak accident breaks his leg. Now I am in the house at my computer I am sure because I am always at the damn computer. Kenny runs in the house out of breath and tells me Cindy you have to come here a Deer broke it's leg it's a baby what should I do? So I run out of the house to see the deer almost falling on my ass due to the slippery mud - had nothing to do with the beer! So I see this deer I am freaking out. I Know, I am gonna call the Deer Rescue People. So I run into the house and grab the phone. I dial 411 - Can I have the number to the Deer Rescue in Placerville. The operator says excuse me? There is no deer rescue how about the animal shelter. I say OK because I know they will have the number to the Deer Rescue. Well it's a Sunday and it isn't open but they have a number you can call so I call it -you know for emergencies. Now picture this in my mind I am thinking that the deer rescue is going to come out with the deer ambulance get this little deer and put him or her on a stretcher take it away and put a cast on it's leg. What the hell do I know about deer anyway. So I call the number it is the Sheriff so I have them come out. They must know how to get to the deer rescue, right? Well here they come walking up with their guns. I am like What The F***!! They proceed to tell us that they have to shoot the deer. I am saying are you kidding me I don't want that I want you to send the Deer Rescue people. They try and explain there is no such place, but I know they are just saying that because they are really hunters. So I tell them no you can't just leave the poor thing alone. They also inform us at this time that we can shoot the deer because it is our property and that it is fine. So we send them away I am just sick at the thought that they want to shoot this poor animal and not put a damn cast on it's leg. So this deer is falling all over the place and it's mother is right by its side. I am heart broken about this and want to blame Kenny and Rob - of course it must be their fault right? So I go in the house, hoping it will all just somehow go away and I will see the little guy limping around for the rest of his life. So Kenny and Rob come into the house - they come in as a team - I am sure they were more worried about what I was going to do to them then that damn deer. They explain to me this deer is suffering and we really need to shoot it. So I break down and say okay we have to do what we have to do. So We all go out there Kenny with his stupid little pistol and Rob right behind him and me standing at the top of the hill yelling you better not miss because I will kill you. Anyway Kenny says he has to get close so he won't miss. But the mother is right there and now Kenny is saying shit I can't shoot this deer especially not in front of it's mother. So he can't bring himself to do it, and I tell him, no problem that's a good thing because tomorrow is Monday and I can find the Deer Rescue place. The next morning the poor thing was dead and we barried it. And we realized at that moment we were NOT country folks by any means.

Okay so here is what I learned from the whole experience! THERE IS NO DAMN DEER RESCUE! We should have shot the damn thing and kept the meat especially when I just had to spend 134.00 on groceries for NOTHING the other day. And City folks probably have no right to move to the country without lessons and classes! And even more beer can make it seem OKAY!

Next I can tell you about the damn day and the lawn mower!